Eating Disorder Triggers, Thoughts, and a Spiritual Solution

If you’ve ever tried to run a marathon up an ice-covered mountain with bears and alligators chasing you in the middle of a blizzard, then you have a fraction of an idea what it’s like to battle an eating disorder. Eating disorder triggers, thoughts (both positive and negative), and a spiritual solution are all explained here.

I binged today. Not the biggest one I’ve ever had, but it was definitely a binge. Every time I binge I feel increasingly more out of control. I know what I could do to prevent it, but at that moment, I know what I want. All I want is a quick fix. I want the binge. I’m not thinking about what happens after it, I’m thinking about the relief and feeling of euphoria for a max of maybe thirty minutes, at most. I’m not thinking of the crash, shame, and disgust that always comes within a few minutes of the high wearing off.

Related: A Journey to Recovery from Binge Eating Disorder (My Story)

Eating Disorder Triggers, Thoughts, and a Spiritual Solution If you've ever tried to run a marathon up a mountain on sheer ice with bears and alligators chasing you in the middle of a blizzard...daily, then you have a fraction of an idea what it's like to battle an eating disorder. Eating disorder triggers, thoughts- both positive and negative, and a spiritual solution are all explained in this post. #eatingdisorders #trigger #negativethoughts

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Leading up to the binge

Eating Disorders, Negative Thoughts, Triggers and a Spiritual Solution

I can usually tell when a binge is coming. It’s like an asteroid hurtling through space, knowing it’s going to eventually hit something, but not knowing what or when until just before it happens. At least, that’s what I think it’s like. I really have no idea what an asteroid is thinking, let alone if every single asteroid hits something while barreling through outer space. I’m no space expert. (Shocking, I know!)

Sometimes, the binge sneaks up on me. It’s all quiet until something triggers me and the feeling is suddenly upon me. It’s like a jack-in-the-box- scary, annoying and creepy.

Eating disorder triggers

Eating Disorders, Negative Thoughts, Triggers and a Spiritual Solution

Today I was trying to figure out if there were any patterns regarding the time right before a binge, such as how I’m feeling, who I’m with (or not with), time of day, etc. It seems that my triggers for bingeing are pretty similar to my triggers for migraines.

Being tired, hungry, and stressed are the biggest triggers for both. So… if I could sleep twelve hours a night, never be hungry, and live in a utopia, I’d be rid of a huge chunk of my problems! Sounds simple, right?

Being alone is another one of my triggers because I have a disease of isolation and when I’m alone my ED (eating disorder) tells me, “Hey, no one’s around, you can eat what and however much you want! Go for it, no one will know!”

My ED sounds like a cheerleader…a cheerleader from hell!

A separate entity

When I think of my ED as a separate entity of myself, it’s easier to distance myself from it and tell it what I don’t like and what I won’t do.

I’m currently reading Life Without Ed (How One Woman Declared Independence from Her Eating Disorder and How You Can Too) by Jenni Schaefer. In the book, she talks about divorcing her eating disorder, or Ed as she calls “him”. I highly recommend this book!

If you’re interested in that book, she also wrote a follow-up book, Goodbye Ed, Hello Me (Recover from Your Eating Disorder and Fall in Love with Life), which is also excellent.

So, what are your triggers?

Have you ever sat down and thought long and hard about what makes you binge, restrict, and/or purge?

Once you identify all of your triggers, and I do mean ALL of them, then you can better prepare yourself for the times you are most vulnerable and at risk.

Hold up…where did that come from?

I had something scary happen to me about a month ago. I don’t know where it came from, as it’s the complete opposite end of the spectrum from my eating disorder. I was frustratedly thinking one day about what could be preventing me from losing weight when all of a sudden a thought popped into my head. The thought itself was odd, but my reaction to it was what caught me completely off guard.

The thought that came out of nowhere was, “Why don’t you just starve yourself?”

Um…whaaaaaaat?!

My gut reaction to that was to feel stupid and wonder why I hadn’t thought of that sooner.

Then reality came rushing in and I was left thinking that I had had a small mental breakdown.

I’ve thought about that voice that came out of nowhere a few times since then, but I know I’d never be able to “just” starve myself because 1) It would just make everything worse, mentally, emotionally, and physically, and 2) I’m a binge eater for crying out loud! I binge to forget my problems, so if I were to (try to) starve myself, I would just want to binge to compensate…right?

ED thoughts

Eating Disorders, Negative Thoughts, Triggers and a Spiritual Solution

Everyone has negative thoughts rolling around in their heads throughout the day (if not, PLEASE tell me your secret!). Well, I’m calling out my negative thoughts and sharing them with you. Maybe it’ll be like spraying for vermin and the negative thoughts/vermin will die. The best thing about thoughts compared to vermin, though, is that there aren’t any dead bodies to clean up afterward.

Ok, moving on…

Trigger warning: If negative thoughts are triggering to you, skip this section.

Negative thoughts

Here are the terrible thoughts I hear in my head (from my ED) that speak to me. Every. Single. Day.

  1. You will never be a normal, healthy body weight.
  2. You will never be able to stop bingeing.
  3. You will never have a positive body image.
  4. The only way you’ll lose weight is if you starve yourself, and you can’t even do that!
  5. You will never recover.
  6. Life will never get better.
  7. You’re so fat, you’re going to die young.
  8. You will never have the confidence to stand up for yourself.
  9. You’re so lazy. Always have been, always will be.
  10. Why does anyone care about you? You’re disgusting and worthless.

Yes, I could sit here reading those thoughts and sob, but as of right this minute, I feel strong and powerful. I feel like I can take this ED on and beat it to a bloody pulp.

No, I don’t always feel this confident. In fact, I rarely do, but writing it down and sharing it is rather freeing. Those “vermin” aren’t going to be hiding in my “house” tonight!

Alternative/positive thoughts

Now, if I do one of the activities from the book Life Without Ed and turn my negative thoughts into positive ones, it would look like this:

  1. I will lose this weight and become healthy and free.
  2. I can and will find peace and maintain a binge-free life. It will take work, but I’ll get there.
  3. My body image will change as I start to recover. My positive body image is attainable and sustainable.
  4. I don’t need to starve myself. My mind will recover and my weight will follow.
  5. I can and will recover from this disease.
  6. My life will get better- spiritually, mentally, and physically.
  7. The weight will come off and I’ll be healthy and live a long life.
  8. As I recover, so too will my confidence, which will help me to not need the constant approval of others for my own feelings of self-worth.
  9. As I lose weight, both physically and mentally, my energy will increase and I’ll be unstoppable!
  10. I am loveable, sweet, smart, and have a lot to offer. I am valuable.

My spiritual guardian

Eating Disorders, Negative Thoughts, Triggers and a Spiritual Solution

I recently made a decision that I needed something to have with me that I could physically see and touch to remind me that I’m never alone, even when I feel like I am. As I searched for ideas, I came across dog tags, like the military gives to soldiers. I have no idea why I thought getting one of those would be a good idea, but I went with it and purchased it for a cool $6 online.

I know I am watched over and protected at all times, but I tend to forget that fact and thought that having something clunky hanging from my neck would be a constant reminder that I’m not alone. I was able to have it personalized and came up with the perfect message to read if just feeling it next to my heart isn’t enough.

As I was journaling about my reasons for wanting such an odd piece of jewelry (is it considered jewelry?), I realized that I had decided on dog tags (yes, I might have been a little slow there).

So tell me…what does DOG spell backward?

You got it- my perfect solution.

Personalized Military Dog Tags – 10 Tag Colors & 39 Silencers to choose from!

Final thoughts on eating disorder triggers and negative thoughts

Although negative thoughts are a normal and natural part of life, to someone with an eating disorder, they can be very triggering and lead to something more sinister.

Figuring out what your triggers are and finding an alternative outlet for your negative thoughts takes time and energy, but it’s definitely worth it. It’s kind of like untangling a string of Christmas lights (stay with me here)- you have to find where it all starts, you’ll probably get pissed off somewhere in the middle, but after a while, you’ll start to see the end and come to realize… it’s going to be absolutely beautiful.

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Eating Disorder Triggers, Thoughts, and a Spiritual Solution If you've ever tried to run a marathon up a mountain on sheer ice with bears and alligators chasing you in the middle of a blizzard...daily, then you have a fraction of an idea what it's like to battle an eating disorder. Eating disorder triggers, thoughts- both positive and negative, and a spiritual solution are all explained in this post. #eatingdisorders #trigger #negativethoughts

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